Normal to ... NICU

Yesterday was a really happy day that took a really sad and scary turn.

Side note: If I had been able to choose any day for Anderson to be born it would've been the 29th; Elliott was born on 11-29 and 1-29 is my Aunt Lisa's birthday! However, I just couldn't resist being offered an induction for the 28th! Haha.

The first really hard thing of the day was that my mom woke up with a horrible stomach bug. It had been going around... Tony, Elliott and I all had it this past week, and unfortunately she woke up feeling terrible, and was also probably very exhausted from labor/delivery and being here this past week helping us get through it ourselves. So, she wasn't able to come up today and see us. I feel so incredible bad for her. I missed her a lot today.

Most of the day was a typical "first day with your baby" type of day. We were exhausted because Anderson woke up almost every hour but we were so happy and got to introduce him to all the visitors {including his BIG BRO}, give him a bath, and had a visit from the pediatrician.

Elliott met his little brother and was SO IN LOVE. It was probably one of my very favorite life moments to date. The way he said "Baby Brother" with the BIGGEST smile on his face was the best thing ever. SO glad we got that on video!! He was so ready to hold him and get down to carry him. Haha! Looks like we're going to have to keep a watchful eye on him around the baby. Nothing compared to being able to hold both my boys in my arms. You know that corny quote about how your child is your heart walking outside your chest. It's true. I can't even begin to describe my love for these boys.

     

This afternoon Anderson had some visitors and he got a sponge bath. He did great getting washed but wasn't happy when he was laying down without being held. It was fun seeing his fluffy hair. His hair is definitely lighter than Elliott's was when he was born.

    

    

 

Feedings got harder and harder this afternoon which was starting to worry me a little bit, but I also know that newborn stomachs are only about the size of walnuts (or something like that!). 

Early in the evening the pediatrician came and examined him and said everything looked great, but then a little later in the evening I noticed his breathing was kind of weird. I've only had a newborn once so a part of me thought maybe it was just kind of different but then I started thinking it was abnormal... then he started doing this gagging/choking thing.... still not eating very well, despite the fact that I was producing quite a bit of colostrum already at that point.... and then my mom instincts kicked in and I knew something was wrong. Thank God for the nurse we had (the one in the pics giving him a bath) who was only very experienced, but genuinely listened to my concerns and spent some extra time examining him. I trust the pediatrician, it's who we use for both boys and he's great, so I feel like things started getting worse pretty quickly after he left because I know he would have caught such high respiratory rates, and it was pretty obvious his breathing was not normal. The nurse called our pediatrician back, who was surprised to hear how much things had changed in just a couple hours, and he instructed the nurse to keep monitoring him and call NICU if she kept getting high respiratory rates. They want babies to stay around 60 and he was in the high 90's.

So, around 11pm NICU came down and had to take him.

I was so so so incredibly scared. She said, "Would you like to kiss your baby goodbye before we take him upstairs? You guys can come in a little bit after we get some blood, run tests, and get him set up in a room." Tony walked him up there with the nurses and before he left he gave me a big hug and a kiss on the forehead and told me that we weren't allowed to have any more babies because this was all just too scary! First my blood pressure issue and now this. After they left I changed into regular clothes from my gown so I'd be able to go upstairs and see him when he was ready and then I tried to get ahold of my parents and couldn't. I'm not sure I've ever felt so scared and alone. I didn't know what was happening, I couldn't get ahold of anyone on the phone, so I just sat on the bed and cried.

Tony came back down to my room and once they let us know he was settled and they had done everything they needed to do (apparently it was super hard getting blood drawn from him and they had to wait on one of their flight nurses to come), we went up together to see him and meet the nurse and then came back down to my room for the night. It was actually a relief to know he was in good hands and being watched for the night because I was getting pretty scared to even hold him with how his breathing was and with the gagging/choking thing he was doing. It was a super late night, well, really early morning, but we were able to get a few really good hours of sleep and then after waking up I took a shower which made me feel so much better.

We are really really hoping and praying we can figure all of this out quickly.